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I’m still trying to figure out why Rumer Willis made this list, being that she looks more like Jiminy Glick than she does Demi Moore.

There’s clearly not much to choose from (if you can think of more, leave their names in the comments section below).

Goldie Hawn – Kate Hudson

Peggy Lipton – Rashida Jones

Lisa Bonet – Zoe Kravitz

Bebe Buell – Liv Tyler

Marcheline Bertrand – Angelina Jolie

Susan Sarandon – Eva Amurri

Janet Leigh – Jamie Lee Curtis

Demi Moore – Rumer Willis

Janet Jones – Paulina Gretzky

Bianca Jagger – Jade Jagger

Jerry Hall – Elizabeth Jagger

Colleen Farrington – Diane Lane

Pearl Lowe – Daisy Lowe

Photo Credit: Pop Crunch

I finally understand why the entire Mobile, Alabama populace wanted to uproot that tree. They were not after that leprechaun’s lucky charm’s, but the diamond emblazoned Lucky Charm’s box he had swangin’ ’round his neck.

Where would the intertubes be without the benighted?

Probably the same place Tron Guy would be if it weren’t for the recession…

YUNG JOC

YUNG BERG

GUCCI MANE

GHOSTFACE KILLAH

VERBAL FROM THE TERIYAKI BOYZ

RICK ROSS

BUSTA RHYMES

T-PAIN

SEAN KINGSTON

SKOOL BOY

N.O.R.E.

LIL’ FLIP

PHARRELL

PLIES

PETEY PABLO

Photo credit: Broken Cool

Remember when the only hot chick-fighter you knew of was Gina Carano? Now you can proudly tell all of your friends (or your parents) that you know 40 or so more.

Only, we didn’t list any of their names so you’ll just have to guess who these girls are… and most of these girls are models, not fighters, so good luck with that…

Regardless, they’re all pretty hot (plus one of them is Keeley Hazell), so if you don’t enjoy this gallery, you’ve got more problems than just living in mom’s basement. Enjoy.

Being that I’ve spent my entire life living in Los Angeles, four of those years being at a Karl Dorrell led UCLA, I really have no football team to root for.

And as you can imagine, particularly if you’re from the greater LA area, when you have no team to root for, you either root for a) skull exploding hits, b) individual players failing their teams (a la Tony Romo’s season ending fumbled snap) or c) Notre Dame’s Jimmy Clausen accomplishing both a) and b) on an every-Saturday basis (things are looking pretty good for option c) thus far).

Because there simply aren’t enough minutes in the day to watch the dismemberment of Clausen, here are 5 great football celebration fails.

5. The – 40 Yard Dash

Everybody wants this guy on their team. let the recruitment process begin…

4. Cougars Don’t Leave Balls Unrecovered

Especially when the Cougars are desperate…

3. Wrong Endzone, Buddy

Some careers end with injury, but Jim Marshall’s career comes to an end after a successful fumble recovery.

2. Desean Jackson Is Premature

This isn’t going to make Andy Reid very happy…

1. Hall Of Fame Type Fail

If you could be inducted into the NFL Hall of Fame for anything but being a great player, this is what would earn your bid.

It’s easily the greatest single play in football history, and that goes for both American and European Football combined.

If you’re Jennifer Lopez, getting older and growing into your gigantic ass is a good thing. If you’re Val Kilmer, getting older and growing a gigantic ass… not such a good thing.

Kirstie Alley FTW.

Val Kilmer

Steven Segal

Sharon Stone

Nick Nolte

Mickey Rourke

Elizabeth Taylor

Kirstie Alley

Kelly LeBrock

Keith Richards

Kathleen Turner

Janice Dickinson

Jamie Lee Curtis

Jack Nicholson

Haley Joel Osment

Farrah Fawcett

David Lee Roth

Cybil Shepard

Bridget Bardot

Bridgette Nelson

Al Pacino

Kylie Minogue

Bon Jovi

Catherine Zeta-Jones

Will Smith

Spice Girls

Jennifer Lopez

Marriage is something to celebrate and along with that celebration, cake is usually served. But because it seems that somehow there are more divorces taking place in the US than marriages, cake makers (bakers?) have found a new way to turn a dime on the booming divorce business.

Here are 14 great examples.

Kirstie Alley, keep your hands off.

If you’re Lady Gaga, dressing up in costumes isn’t something reserved for October 31st, but for everyone else it means sexually explicit, innuendo rich, almost naked, sexed up renditions of the blue-collar workforce and the occasional “sexy” fairy tale character.

Celebrities take Halloween just as seriously (unless they’re Jessica Alba)… even Coco dressed up, and by dressing up I mean wearing more clothes than she usually does, which is no clothes at all.

Selita Ebanks

Paris Hilton

Michelle Trachtenberg

Mariah Carey

Katie Price

Jessica Alba

Holly Madison

Heidi Klum

AnnaLynne McCord

Coco & Rihanna

Audrina Patridge

Our buddies at The Taco put together a pretty funny/accurate list, breaking down the cliche 2009 Halloween costumes.

Here’s an excerpt:

Lady Gaga

What You Thought It Said:

Hey, look at me! I’m up-to-date on general pop culture knowledge! I tore the hood off of my eskimo coat and put googly eyes on it all by myself, and I even bought large, stupid sunglasses because that’s how crafty and creative I am.

What It Really Said:

I always follow crowds and do whatever is trendy and cool at the moment, so why wouldn’t I wear the most popular costume of 2009?  That’s how I fit in!

What People Said About You:

“That’s the chubbiest Lady Gaga I’ve seen all night.”

For the complete list, head on over to Holy Taco.

This is what happens when you rely too heavily on freetranslation.com. However, the whole no standing in the toilet facing the wall thing I have no explanation for…

If there was ever a sign that you are giving up on life, it’s not that you’re so morbidly obese that you are 38 and you scoot around on the same type of scooter my 84 year-old grandfather turned to after his cane gave way to a walker – his walker ultimately not enough support for his degenerating body.

At 82 he turned to a scooter, and only because a doctor recommended it after his arthritis became so bad that after a day on his feet, his knees would swell up the size of a cantaloupe – or in morbidly obese terms – the size of a small order of fries.

But still, the fact that your fat ass sits on one of these vehicles instead of walking through Wal-Mart is not the sign that you gave up on life, no. The real sign you gave up on life is that you’re sitting on a scooter in the drive-thru line at the local KFC – the same fast food joint that put you in your scooter in the first place.

Ricky Gervais would agree with me, and as always, is more articulate than I am which he makes apparent in this excellent video.

You’ll also like:

Drunk stories that will make your butt explode (When I Was Drunk)
Most awesome wake up pranks compilation (Break)
How to get laid (AskMen)
Candy Ace is a 12 out of 10 (Gorillamask)
7 New Professors on Rate My Professor (CollegeHumor)
7 Sex tips that will put you in the hospital (Cracked)