The problem with any bikini contest, especially one in California, is that none of the best looking women enter. This is because beautiful women know they’re beautiful and do not need their attractiveness validated by three 40-year-old judges and a crown and consequently do not enter (plus, entering would just confirm the shallowness that everyone already suspects of them because they are so attractive).

Consequently, you get cuspers (girls riding the cusp of attractiveness) who enter, and no one really wants to see that.

But today you get to anyway.

(For a slightly more attractive gallery, check out these Ukranians).

Recently announced 2009 Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Edition cover model, Bar Refaeli, showed her assets off on The Late Show with David Letterman on Wednesday night.

From there, she headed to the SI Swimsuit Edition release party, and if you’re still reading this, you’re either gay or you’re a woman. Or maybe a tranny? Or I suppose, a hermaphrodite, though I really don’t know how those things work.

Sorry I have nothing insightful to say…

Jamie Peery Bahama Bikini Shoot (The Bachelor Guy)
A tribute to the boob tattoo (Afrojacks)
Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show Model Power Rankings (Gunaxin)
A-Rod and Madonna can stop now (Epic Carnival)
The Girls of November (The World of Isaac)
What Does $900 Million Of Missile Defense Look Like?  (YepYep)

What not to wear (9 to Fried)
10 Places to Buy Christmas Presents Online for your Girlfriend (the Jebbica)
Best Booty Ever? (MoonDog Sports) -
Nice rocky tops (Hugging Harold Reynolds)
Get your nerd on with a bunch of porn stars in Sci-Fi gear SFW (Observation Bubble)

PITTSBURGH (AP) — Rinku Singh and Dinesh Patel signed free-agent contracts with the Pirates on Monday despite the fact that neither prospect had ever thrown a baseball until earlier this year.

Singh and Patel arrived in the United States six months ago after finishing in an Indian reality TV show called the “Million Dollar Arm” at the top of their class. The show sought athletes who could throw strikes at 85 miles per hour or faster – requirements for a coveted spot among MLB batting practice pitchers.

Pittsburgh Pirate insider Christopher Crosby comments on the acquisition:

“Sure they’ve never played a professional baseball game, and yes, they learned how to throw this year, but that’s why they’ve meshed so well with the rest of the organization.”

The Pirates, who have not had a winning record since 1992 went 67-95 in 2008. And though their last place finish was dismal, Crosby fondly remembers the positive moments of the atrocious season.

“August was a great month for the club. We were playing great ball and I’ll never forget that hot August night — the night we won a game against the Reds. And even though they beat us handily the next day, that single win was our longest winning streak all year and it’s something we’re very proud of.”

The club has made several aggressive offseason moves in preparation for the 2009 season and they expect to be in top shape come spring.

“With two Indians and several more ‘Stars’ finalists in our bullpen, we’re confident we’ll avoid losing 100 games in 2009 like we were barely able to do in 2008. It’s a huge accomplishment.”

The Stars finalists he mentions are in reference to the club’s interest in seeking talent in unconventional ways.

“After finding a couple of Indians on a gameshow, we thought, ‘why not tap into the talent of our favorite gameshow, Dancing with the Stars?’ It’s been a big hit in the office and we’re already in talks with three of the top five pairs from 2008. The 2009 season is going to be a great season, and we feel the same way about the ’09 Pirates’ season as well.”

With tons of potential and limited room, make sure to tune in to 2009 Pirate baseball to see who prevails, and who gets voted off the island.

I usually try to refrain from posting about random chicks releasing calendars that no one but mechanics buy, but I feel obligated because we’re not talking about some random chick, we’re talking about Keeley Hazell.

For more Keeley calendar goodness, go here, but beware, these are nsfw.

Here are a few more links you’ll enjoy:
Oh no, someone doesn’t like Paris, the world is going to end now [Celebslam]
Polamalu doesn’t like the new way the NFL does business [Co-ed Magazine]
10 t-shirt designs you wish you came up with [uncoached]
If you like the women of UFC then you should check this out (NSFW) [on 205th]

A cheep kind of beer you may want to consider [Tasty Booze]
You may want to join the military after you see some of these girls [Bright Black Internet]
It looks really good when you can get your fans to actually do this [Brahsome]
A few things for you Rays fans to think about [Epic Carnival]
My man Mark doesn’t like Jewish people to much [Drunken Stepfather]
Some key things to think about if your NCAAF team is done for [Next Round]
Where is Pacman Jones, wait I mean Adam Jones [Deuce of Davenport]
It would be awesome to photograph a girl that looks like this [Machochip]

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