The Chinese are still trying to find new ways of limiting their female population. Cheung Soo Yung Chang, give her the blade!

Leryn Franco competed for Paraguay at the 2008 Beijing Olympics, tossing her javelin 15 meters shy of her personal record to finish 51st overall. Thoroughly embarrassed, but sexy nonetheless, Leryn Franco flew home to Paraguay and shot a gold medal winning swimsuit calendar.

In 2009 her luck failed again–Leryn Franco placed 86th in AskMen’s Top 99 Women poll. We suspect voter fraud kept her out of the Top 10 (mostly because Anne Hathaway, who has a unibrow, placed 5th!?)

No?

Mena Suvari and Kelly Brook have.

A Chinese condom company is using photographs of the British model and Hollywood actress to erect the struggling company in the midst of a flaccid contraception market–without paying the women their deserved royalties–pretty surprising for a Chinese company.

Not so surprisingly, the Kelly Brook condoms are outperforming the Suvari prophylactics at an exponential rate.

What does this all mean?

Chinese males have material to masturbate to when their unused, dusty, Kelly Brook condoms reach their expiration date.

Yang was at the town square in the Henan Province of China watching the musical fountain show with some friends, dancing around the light bursts of water and enjoying herself when from below her a jet erupted, projecting her above the heads of her friends.

When she landed, Yang was bleeding profusely and her energy succumbed to extreme stomach pains–her friends called for help and she was immediately taken to the hospital for treatment. The doctor explained that her vagina had been torn and her intestines had been damaged by the pressure of the water fountain–damage that would take three surgeries over a seven month span to correct.

Though her scars will be with her for life, she believes suing for $24,500 will help reconcile her poor decision making.

(News Source)

BEIJING — Despite relentless questions regarding the eligibility of the Chinese toddler gymnastics team that won the gold medal for women, the International Olympic Committee said Friday that further proof is needed for the case to continue, less it will be “put to rest.”

China has again provided documents from the 2004 team for the 2008 team, proving their eligibility. Coach Lu Shanzhen said the girls’ families are “indignant” that these issues, like most of their freedoms, won’t get swept under the carpet.

“It’s not just me. The parents of our athletes are all very indignant,” Lu explained in an hearing with The Associated Press. “They have faced groundless suspicion. Why aren’t they believed? Why are their children suspected?”

Editor’s Thoughts: Instead of China providing documents, which are about as authentic as the copy of Terminator Salvation I managed to snag on DVD a year before it’s theatrical release in 2009 (I know this not because it’s a pre-release, but because there was dried blood on the packaging, likely from the 9 year old’s fingers who was beaten and forced to package it), China needs to provide photographic evidence that He Kexin is older than she appears in the below picture, which is impossible.

Who needs it in writing when you’ve got it in the flesh?

Even though their names sound Eastern European, or in the case of Shawn Johnson, Celtic (the Boston kind) – this trifecta is actually the cornerstone of Team USA’s female artistic gymnastic discipline.

Coming in at under 5′2″, The trio is a perfect fit in China – Less their gender, we all know how the Chinese people (government) cherish their baby girls.

Shawn Johnson

Date of birth: January 19, 1992 (age 16)
Place of birth: West Des Moines, Iowa
Height: 4′9″

Keep your pants on guys, she’s only 16.

Nastia Liukin

Full name: Anastasia Valeryevna Liukin
Date of birth: October 30, 1989 (age 18)
Place of birth: Moscow
Height: 5′2″

Alicia Sacramone

Date of birth: December 3, 1987 (age 20)
Place of birth: Winchester, Massachusetts
Height: 5′0″