When it comes to getting pants-pissingly wasted at the bar, hopping into your covered wagon and trying to get home to your mustached wife safely and without attracting the attention of the horse mounted cop squad, take a lesson from grandpa; play it cool, and if an officer offers you a swig from his breathalyzer shaped whisky flask, take it.

Better yet, offer him the first swig — a little generosity goes a long way.

Relevant video: Russia In 15 Seconds

If you’re me, you chill out in the backseat, make some light conversation and thank the officer for the ride upon your arrival. But if you’re Tasha Lee Cantrell, you pop a tall boy of Steel Reserve and hope that no one notices.

The Smoking Gun reports:

While chauffeuring Cantrell, Officer Landis heard the teenager “open a can of some sort” in the back of the cruiser. “As I looked at my in car video I observed Cantrell drinking out of an unknown can.” Landis stopped his car and, upon further investigation, determined that Cantrell had popped open a can of Steel Reserve, a malt liquor known for its high alcohol content.

“When I opened the rear passenger door I observed Cantrell attempting to hide the can between her legs. I retrieved this can and noticed it was Steel Reserve Beer,” reported Landis, who immediately arrested Cantrell for underage drinking. Instead of being shuttled to her doorstep, Cantrell, pictured in the below mug shot, was rerouted to the sheriff’s office, where she was booked on the misdemeanor charge.

I’m no rock scientist, but I’ve got a pretty damn good idea that this classy Tasha girl would get along with my friends just fine.

A beerbong for the lady…

I’m no rock scientist, but I’ve got a hunch that this isn’t going to end in an infraction.

AN Adelaide man will face separate drink driving charges after going to a police station to ask for directions.

The 27-year-old was breath-tested at the police station, charged with drink driving and had his license suspended on the spot.

Police say the man went to the Aldinga station, south of Adelaide, on Friday to ask for directions to a local school so he could pick up his grandchildren.

After being charged, the man left the Aldinga police station – and drove away.

Patrols later found him driving again, with his grandchildren in the car.

The man is due to face court next month.

How a 27-year-old has grandchildren makes about as much sense as his decision making…

2. All you had to do was drive in a straight line to get your oil changed but you were too big of a dumb@ss. You just couldn’t wait to drop your car through the floor couldn’t ya? Good luck getting that one out.

3. I guess the right move would have been, put your car in park? It’s too bad this asian guy wasn’t driving a rice rocket with a huge handle/spoiler on the back – would have loved to see that get ripped off.

4. Make sure you watch the whole thing, and just try to figure out what this woman was doing. Is she drunk? Is she just, retarded? It’s frightening to know that these people exist.

5. This one has baffled me since the first time I saw it. How do you manage to roll your station wagon on a gate? She literally drives up the gate and capsizes her ride. Wish I could have been there.

6. This is what you get for being a white trash douchebag who bought a new mustang. We all know mustangs are for chicks. It’s like an eclipse, or a jetta. Guys in mustangs are douchebags, just like guys who wear Oakley’s are douchebags – I could go on an on about this…

7. Dumb@ss thinks he can outrun a road block, and instead gets a healthy pounding to the underbelly of his car. Genius couldn’t want five seconds.

8. Best part about this video is in the last second when the guy’s sandal goes flying off his foot.

9. Got to love how the women check out the bumper to make sure there are no scratches and then just drive away like nothing happened. Can’t say I’d do it any differently, thought I probably would have chosen not to crash into the turnstile.

10. And finally, when you get your truck turned over on a mountain in Afghanistan, make sure you remember this video and what not to do.