Posts Tagged ‘how not to’

People always make it seem like raising a kid is the most difficult thing in the world (at least the ones who actually care about who their children become), and I’m not saying that this young mother agrees with that statement, because, well, how difficult can duct-taping your kid to the wall when you need a sitter really be?

What I am saying is that teaching your little Jenny life lessons, like how to be strong, upstanding and virtuous is much easier when you choose not to show baby Jenny double-penetration, ass-to-mouth, interracial gang-bang porn at the bi-annual family get-together no matter how upset it makes Hector (who by the way is totally hiding his boner with his left arm).

The first guy jumps off the boat like he’s done it a thousand times, and he probably has, so he lands safely on land. You think to yourself, well if this little islander can do it, I can do it no problem, maybe even better because I’m wearing khakis..

Only problem is, little islander is barefoot and you are wearing wood-soled dress shoes — not exactly made for good traction, especially when jumping off the side of a wet, fiberglass boat.

Shoe flying off mid faceplant FTW.