At 3′7″ and just 65 lbs, Eddie Gaedel made his first and only appearance in baseball with the St. Louis Browns on August 19, 1951 – a publicity stunt for the Falstaff Brewing Corporation.

Little Eddie adorned in elf slippers and a jersey with the number “â…›” on the back walked on four straight balls in his only Major League appearance.

For more on the life of Eddie Gaedel, head to ESPN, bur before you go, check out the Eddie Gaedel gallery below.

That’s not to say there is no validity in the ideas he speaks about (at least from what I’m able to interpret, which by no fault of my own, is minimal).

I’m all for conservative distribution of designer drugs – but when it comes to speaking out against Riddlin and Adderall on live television to talk-show hosts, I have learned vicariously through the body of a certain d-bag that you don’t have to act like a complete d-bag when doing so, even if you are one…

The Today Show With Matt Lauer

As I mentioned before, I’m all for laying off the pill-popping, but that doesn’t necessarily give me the right to start misusing words like glib. If it were up to me, no one would ever use the word glib again, especially when they’re being glib in using said word.

Matt Matt Matt, you don’t even know what Riddelin is.

Tom On Oprah

Nothing says crazy like a white guy jumping up and rubbing his dirty ass feet on a black person’s couch… the whole blatant expression of outofyourfuckingmind thing doesn’t really help much either…

Crazy Tom’s Scientology Video

Watching this video is a lot like being punched in the face really really hard by a really really big dude – you put yourself in a situation you knew you should have never been in, and after you come-to, your thought process feels a little more like Paris Hilton’s feels (or doesn’t feel… though I can’t really blame her – no one ever teaches you that donkey-punches shouldn’t be an everyday thing).

I promise you can watch zero seconds of this video and understand more than you would if you watched the entire thing.

Tommy Takes A Wet One To The Face

He actually appears to enjoy the shot to the face until he realizes that he’s both on the receiving end of a prank, and that the projected liquid is less viscous and less salty than he expected.

Tom Killing Oprah

Sure there are more worthy ‘Crazy Tom’ videos clogging up the intertubes, but I couldn’t resist saving this classic for last.

Aditya “Romeo” Dev of Phagwara, India, is a pocket-size person who is at age 21, just 2 feet, 9 inches tall and weighs less than 20 pounds. Romeo is photographed outside his home and at the gym with his workout buddies where normal-size people crowd on a daily basis to watch little Romeo work out. Romeo is listed in the Guinness book of world records as the worlds smallest bodybuilder. His father told Telegraph,

“He has never been bothered at being so small. He has no inferiority complex. He is the jewel of our family,”

Inferiority complex? A two-foot tall bodybuilder with an inferiority complex? Why would anyone even suggest he might have an inferiority complex?

Oh. Because he’s two feet tall and works out at the gym every day?

Na, couldn’t be, dad says n… Wait a sec, is that Tom Cruise?

Tom Cruise is a midget. Sure it’s shopped, but it’s really not that far off.

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