Posts Tagged ‘morons’

You wouldn’t think that going to the gas station to fill up your tank would lead to an insurance claim for a totaled vehicle, but given the nature of humans and their general disregard for paying attention to what they’re doing, the Full Service option should clearly be getting more use.

Enjoy the following 25 Full Servicers trying their hand and failing at Self Serve.

5. Lifted Smart Car

I understand the novelty, it’s like lifting a golf cart – but this, like cocaine, has got to be God’s way of telling you, “you have too much money.”

Which would you choose: the Smart Car or the DeLorean.

4. Lifted VW Bus

To me this is quite a contradiction. When I think of a VW Bus, I think of Nor-Cal potheads, but when I think of lifted trucks/cars, I think of southern rednecks: Hippes vs. Country Folk, Liberals vs. Conservatives.I guess this guy just had to have the best of both worlds.

This could be the reason why it’s conveniently wedged between the house and the fence, a la Austin Powers.

3. The Colossal Camry

Like #4, this owner wanted two things but could only afford one.

What it says about its owner: “I prefer a safe, low maintenance car that gets great gas mileage, but I’ve heard that chicks only like guys in lifted trucks. Why not have both? Now when I ford the river in my backyard, I can do so with comfort and class… Just don’t punch me in the face, please.”

First it was the ab lounge, which promised a toned mid section and washboard abs while you “lounge” and watch tv. But why settle for a lounge when you can have a chair that’s like a vacation in Hawaii??? Yes, thats right! Perfect abs are not developed by doing crunches, they’re formed from crunching numbers, while sitting in the Hawaii Chair.

To see the Hawaii Chair in action, check out Scott Mills in the video below.

There’s not much to preface here, besides can this honestly be real? If it’s not real and this is all an act, she’s really got some acting chops, almost as good as Leonardo DiCaprio in What’s Eating Gilbert Grape.

Of all the designer watches in the market, the most user compliant ones are the citizen watches but still the ones bought the most are swiss watches, closely followed by the invicta watches.

The only reason anyone would want to watch this is for the same reason people go to the circus; to witness the trapeze artist miss the grab, fall to the net but miss it, launching headfirst into the the anus of an elephant who, fortunately for the crowd, felt it the opportune moment to release a steamy shat all over the unfortunate trapeze artist.

The point is, we like to see people get hurt – and then we cringe. But not just at what we just witnessed; more at why we were unable to look away. I think you’ll find yourself unable to look away at most of what you’re about to see (even though you really should). I guess you could say “I warned you.” Even though you probably aren’t even reading this and you’re already watching the video. Why do I even bother, dammit.

Yet another montage of the most ridiculous, dim witted people the net has managed to compile. As expected, not much to preface here. Watch and enjoy.