American football players, also known as actual football players, need to take a lesson on celebrating from their European counterparts — you don’t dump fruit punch Gatorade on your coach, you suplex them onto the field. Everyone should know that by now.

I don’t know about you guys, but when I was playing dodgeball in my younger years at elementary school you could only get someone out by hitting them below the waist and if you hit someone in the head, you got ejected. This caused problems because it’s much more satisfying to hit someone in the face than in the leg, and so naturally, my id would get the best of me and my team would spend the remainder of the game one man down.

On that note, I present 15 people getting hit in the face with balls.

**UPDATE** There are now 16 pictures in this gallery… and the crowd goes wild.

**UPDATE** **UPDATE** There are now 18 pictures in this gallery… and Anthony Weiner flashes his penis.

The soccer equivalent of getting drunk with Kate Upton, getting her into bed and while she’s waiting for you you pass out on the bathroom floor and never see her again.

Yet another of the several reasons not to play soccer. GIF available here.

Athlete/Fan relations seem to always become an issue. This week we had another gay slur from Joakim Noah. In the past, we’ve had fights, we’ve had legal issues, you name it. Spitting actually almost seems benign.

I think this guy just earned himself a role as starting point guard in the WNBA.

The only thing that would make this video any better would be if FC Baar’s Joonas Jokinen (kicker) landed on the back of his head, missed the shot and lost the game.

Call me a cynic but I like to see people fail, and when they do, I want to see them hurt. Fail is what the internet was founded on — you can’t argue with that.

Senegalese soccer player El Hadji Diouf has been photoshopped and memeified by the goons over at the Something Awful Forums in what is becoming one of the best gif memes the internet has to offer.

El Hadji Diouf, it just so turns out, is not a likable person. There have been several occasions during the start of his Premier League career where he spat on fans and other players — in 2004 going as far as spitting on an 11-year-old boy.

Thankfully, the Something Awful goons did a great job shopping this Dioufbag and the following are some of the best examples.

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Liverpool midfielder Steven Gerrard attempts to give a rival Chelsea fan a high five and is owned. Yet another reason these Euros need to grow up and play some real American Football.

Football celebration vs Soccer celebration.

On second thought, suplexing your coach sure looks satisfying. I want to see Hines Ward do that to Mike Tomlin Feb. 6th.

They always say that video games are much more difficult in real life, but I don’t know, this shit looks pretty easy.

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