Marisa Miller gives professional quarterback (if you consider the Detroit Lions professional) Matthew Stafford Hair Action at AXE Lounge at LIV in Miami on Feb. 6.

What is Hair Action?  It’s when a girl can’t resist playing with a guy’s hair after he’s used AXE Hair products, and it often leads to something more. Matthew Stafford gets a lot of it and wants guys out there to get more. Check out how Stafford gets Hair Action in his everyday life – http://apps.facebook.com/axehairaction/.

February through March, Matthew will issue a new Hair Action challenge every two weeks on facebook.com/axe, calling for guys and girls to upload photos and videos of themselves getting or giving Hair Action (c’mon people, let’s keep it sfw please… no one wants to see you blowing a load of AXE’s Lure Conditioner all over the face of your Payton Manning Fathead).

AXE Hair will reward one entrant from each challenge with tickets to a major sporting event in 2010 and daily winners will receive exclusive AXE Hair prize packs.

Officials at the cable provider’s headquarters explained that 30 seconds of full-frontal male pornography from Club Jenna, an adult cable television channel, were shown on the local Super Bowl telecast to families and children of all ages–a scarring that will surely confuse young boys into believing that every time Larry Fitzgerald scores, massive white cocks will be pulled out of jeans and tossed around like thundersticks at Los Angeles Lakers games.

“The Star newsroom was flooded with calls from irate viewers who said that the porn cut into the game with less than three minutes left to play.

Callers said that the clip showed a woman unzipping a man’s pants, followed by a graphic act between the two.

“I just figured it was another commercial until I looked up,” said Cora King of Marana. “Then he did his little dance with everything hanging out.”

If you weren’t unlucky enough to be subjected to the massive white flesh-flute, follow this link if you must–the full video is provided (NSFW).

Something tells me Matt Leinart was behind this.