Woods has a new buddy — Ari Fleischer — Ex-George Bush Press Secretary and Plame Affair attaché. The New York Post reports,

Two sources in the golf community have told The Post that Ari Fleischer, the former presidential advisor to George W. Bush and the man who was brought in to help repair the steroid-shattered image of Mark McGwire, has been huddling with Woods, plotting a strategy for his return to golf — at the Arnold Palmer Invitational starting March 25 at Bay Hill in Orlando, Fla…

Palmer himself reportedly has told some close confidants that Woods is definitely playing Bay Hill. Quietly, the people running the tournament are preparing for a larger-than-usual media crush.

Not that we’d expect anything less from the slag who opened up to news outlets with her Tiger Woods affair story, we’re just surprised it took her this long to segue onto pages of popular men’s magazines, Maxim being the first.

For more of the Jaimee Grubbs photoshoot which will appear in Maxim’s February issue, head to Maxim.com — that is of course if you’re into semi-attractive, pirate-chested, money grubbing slags (who aren’t on the Hills).

Link.

I’ve been hesitant to write anything related to Tiger Woods and his recent affair(s) because the whole situation has overtaken just about everything newsworthy and really needs to end.

That said, it’s nice to see that Elin Nordegren (and her divorce attorney) isn’t the only one cashing in on the whole ordeal.

I might need to pick me up a few of these headcovers…

The airline, based in Florida, employs an animated Bengal Tiger crashing a car into a fire hydrant followed by an announcement for their appropriately named “eye of the tiger” sale where you can find flights for as little as $9.

As far as I’m concerned, single digit flights coupled with an ad campaign featuring a car-crash doesn’t exactly encourage me to book a flight.

But for those of you located in Florida and looking to save a couple bucks, check out Spirit Air.

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World’s Ugliest Dog Sings Silent Night : eCard

The Coolest Chair In The World : REFIN3D

The Tiger Woods Crash Flash Game : HolyTaco

2009 Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show : Maxim

Facebook Suggestions Are Out Of Hand : CollegeHumor

Sex Ed Lessons You Wish You’d learned : Cracked

10 Great Alec Baldwin Moments : Manofest

Jillian Beyor Is The New WWF Diva : Busted Coverage

Star Wars quotes that perfectly describe our sex lives : Asylum

20 Great Photobombs : TheChive

Roxanne G Is A Babe : Gorillamask

After pulling out a come from behind victory to beat Sean O’Hair at Bay Hill, Tiger Woods appears to be settling down after months of rehab. But will he be ready for a major?

We think he’ll be taking home his fifth green jacket on April 12th (we also thought the Dodgers were going to win the world series).

What do you think?

DETROIT (AP)—General Motors Corp. said Monday that it is ending its 9 year endorsement deal with Tiger Woods in order to save money for executive pocket lining.

The endorsement deal, believed to be worth upwards of $7 million a year, was set to end in 2009, but the decision, Woods’ agent Mark Steinberg assures, was “absolutely mutual.” He continues:

“It was a combination of things. Tiger was looking to gain some more time [with his family], and certainly it was an opportunity for GM to reduce its spending with everything going on.”

Tom Krisher, AP Auto Writer comments:

“U.S. automakers, the single largest category of advertisers, cut their ad spending 18 percent to $1.37 billion in the second quarter compared with the same period in 2007.”

Though the auto market is failing, expect GM to re-sign Woods at $10 million a year and throw a $6 million corporate retreat in Barbados once the Fed decides to bail out the useless automaker a la AIG.

(above) Tiger Woods shows his Dodger support at game three of the NLCS in what sports commentators are calling the most awkward picture taken yet during the 2008 post season.

Need to know facts:
Dodgers defeat Phillies (7-2)
Phillies lead series (2-1)
Near Brawl: 3rd Inning after Shane Victorino nearly wore it on the face
Attendees: Tiger Woods, Danny DeVito

Our Thoughts: The Tiger Woods appearance was sponsored by the PGA in an effort to remind people that professional golf still exists, which to be honest, I would rather watch than see Matt Kemp wave at three pitches and strike out one more god damn time (though I admit, he did look better on Sunday).

And a few more scenes from the game:

On September 2, 2008 Tiger Woods announced on his website that he and wife, Elin Nordegren, are just months away from having their second child. Tiger writes on his website:

“This has been a year of contrasts, I had a solid start to the season, won the U.S. Open in an exciting playoff, and then unfortunately had to shut it down after successful knee surgery. And now, I have some wonderful news to report. Sam is going to be a big sister.”

Woods and Nordegren welcomed their first daughter Sam Alexis Woods in June 2007.

“Elin is feeling great and we are both thrilled. While my injury has been disappointing and frustrating, it has allowed me to spend a lot of time watching Sam grow. I can’t begin to tell you how rewarding it is being a dad and spending time with her and Elin. The injury has been a blessing and a disappointment.”

Tiger and Elin took the simple route and named their first child Sam. So in traditional Banned In Hollywood panache, the below are the “Baby Woods: Five Official BANNED Baby Name Suggestions.”

Metal

If Gwyneth Paltrow can name her daughter after a fruit, there’s no reason Tiger Woods shouldn’t name his next child after the clubs he hits furthest: his Metal Woods. Plus when you think about it, the kid will be a Black, Asian and Swedish alloy, if you will. It works on so many levels.

Stee Outada

If Tiger expects this baby to accompany him on Sundays at the Majors, he better put the kids good name to use – and what better way to subconsciously think about staying in the fairway than having his newborn’s name floating through his head on the tee box: Stay Outa The Woods…

Cher

Because Tiger Wood’s annual golf tournament is held at the Sherwood Country Club in Lake Sherwood, CA it’s only fitting that his kid be named accordingly (It’s a bit of a stretch, I know). Plus life as a pro golfer means daddy isn’t around very often. So to insure his daughter not be promiscuous once she grows up, naming her after singer and American Anti-Sex Symbol, Cher, will keep the boys flaccid well into the decades beyond the singer’s impending death.

Holly

If this kid is a girl, and if this girl were my age, and if this girl that were my age looked like her mother Erin Nordegren, and if I were to represent this website as I do, my life goal would also be the name of this very site: BANNED In Holly Woods.

Jessica Simpson attended the 19th Annual American Century Celebrity Golf Championship this past Saturday with her younger sister in tow. To be honest, we have no idea what happened during the tournament. We do not know who won, or if any golf was even played. We do however know that we would never have known the tournament existed had Jessica Simpson not been there.

A few weeks ago it was Kristin Cavallari on the short grass, so it’s nice to see that they are steadily making improvements – though any female breasts are better than either Phil Mickelson or John Daly’s chest.