I was inspired by a Something Awful forum post to put this one together, so before you get your little panties in a bunch and bitch and moan like like all the gay people in West Hollywood because Prop 8 passed, hear me when I say, quit being a little internet crybaby pussy.
This is not a definitive list, just the top 5 sports books that I believe would be the shortest sports books in the history of sports books. And I am right.
5. Times I Didn’t Cry In A Press …

We at Banned have used some of these before and I’m sure you’ve seen a few of them on the interweb, but that still doesn’t change the fact that these five moments in TV Screenshot history, like the breasts of Scarlett Johansson, need to be seen.
5. Wait, seriously?

What kind of fire-hoses are we talking about here exactly?
4. Proving The Obvious

Based on the evidence at hand, the paternity test will conclude what all of us, except for the confused Richard, already know - Mom banged the UPS guy.
The upside? At least now he won’t have …

Sure there are tons of pictures floating around the internet that fit nicely under this title, but to be honest, I just don’t feel like compiling fifty images, writing about all of them, and having five people read while the other fifty thousand just look at the pictures.
But don’t get me wrong, I usually fall comfortably into the latter of the aforementioned two groups. I’m the kind of guy that thinks, “why buy the books when I’ve got Spark Notes? And even if Spark Notes only summarizes 80% of the …

5. The Burgundy Boner

Was it staged? Of course it was staged, but it sets the pace and the theme for today’s Top 5. Strong force and proud ownership make this untimely boner stand out from the rest.
4. The Poolside Speedo Boner

Was it staged? Unless this guy has a sense of humor about himself, this is a genuine untimely boner. His choice in Speedo over, well, anything else, further suggests this guy is all business, which renders it an honest boner.
Notice how there are no chicks in the pool – …