It is, more or less, like watching a man fire himself from a cannonball only to miss the landing pad and crumple onto the dirt in a discombobulated pile of skin and bones, you shouldn’t look, but you do, and after you do you can’t help replaying the video seven times over.

8 Coaches Who Are Also Douche Bags (Holy Taco)

Electro Man Summons Star Wars Music (Double Viking)

Jenna Jameson Is Officially A Baby Momma (Busted Coverage)

Jennifer Lopez Delivers THE Sports Quote Of 2009 (Extra Mustard)

15 Amazing Tattoos Of Celebrities (Uncoached)

A Photo Gallery Of Drunk St. Patty’s Day Girl Debauchery (COED Magazine)

Kid Can’t Figure Out How To Kick A Ball (Gorillamask)

The 10 Raddest Racing Games Of All Time (Spike)

1,000 Ways To Open A Beer (Sublime Directory)

Madonna Is About To Lose Her Mind (WWTDD)

Heather Graham Can Still Rock A Bikini (Celebrity Odor)

Katy Perry In Lingerie For FHM Russia (Camel Tap)

The World’s Biggest Shocker (Don Chavez)

Experience St. Patrick’s Day In 30 Seconds (Epic Carnival)

5 Ridiculous (Safe For Work) Fetishes (Cracked)

If someone could please explain this one to me in the comments (and not just Photoshop) I will buy you a helmet with a plastic pastel colored dollhouse attached to it.

The interview I probably cannot do.

Just hope that papa bear doesn’t come looking for a little late night action with momma bear.

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Other people are just stupid.

Michael Otero pulled into the lot of a 7-11 convenience store (only convenient if you’re trying to gain 30 pounds by the end of the month by eating cheese injected hot dogs that have been sitting on the rotisserie since yesterday of last week) and parked his newly purchased red pickup truck with a manual transmission directly in front of the store.

He got out of the vehicle, entered the store, and began his nightly routine by purchasing the most unhealthy food available to the greater Laguna Beach community.

When he returned to his truck–he was struck with the greatest fear that any man who hates walking and doesn’t exercise can imagine–his truck was gone and his hands were full of crinkle cut cheddar cheese fries and a family sized bag of Baken-Ets brand zero-carb fried pork skins.

For 120 seconds, Otero debated whether it was worth dropping one of the delicious treats in order to free up a hand to dial 9-1-1 on his mobile phone, but he decided that the call could wait. He stood in the parking lot, sad, alone, and staring blankly at where his car had been while trying to come up with some logical explanation for his truck’s disappearance.

“It’s almost like a ghost,” Otero said scientifically.

After he devoured his fries, he dialed 9-1-1 with his greasy sausage fingers and told the operator on the other end that his car had been stolen. Laguna Beach Police responded in minutes because they had nothing better to do in the quiet beach town, and hoping to catch a glimpse of the culprit, pulled the surveillance video from the convenience store.

This is what they saw.

“I still don’t believe it,” said Otero–continuing profoundly, “This is like a car hole-in-one.”

Hopefully you will feel the same way after seeing these glorious 15, but if not you can go fu©k yourself… Enjoy.

15. If your junk’s broke…

Why fix your situation when you can fix your state of mind? Looks like you’re going to need another bottle there soon champ.

14. Made In China…

Sometimes hawking labor to China pays off in negative ways.

13. Makes you nervous…

What do you do if the only urinal left is the 7cm? This puts a whole new set of rules into what men call The Urinal Game.

12. Am Depressed…

Your life is obviously conflicted. You have no idea why people enjoy avoiding your company, so you shave your head but leave a mud-flap to hang over your face. You then put on your sad face, snap a pic and upload it to MySpace.

Sometimes it’s so sad to so simply determine why someone is so sad – it’s cyclical. An old fashioned catch-22. You’re sad because no one wants to be your friend, but no one wants to be your friend because you’re sad.

11. Rock…

I don’t know what the fu©k that is, but god damn if I saw that thing at Coachella I’d head to it’s stage instead of Radiohead’s for the same reason people make the trip to see the Aurora Borealis.

10. Reproductions spawns Star Wars sequels…

How do you think Lucas did it?

9. WTF are you???

I think the bigger question is, who the fu©k owns a pair of glasses that are that god damn small?

8. LARPing…

It’s usually played with friends, which means it’s never played at all.

7. No need for an abortion…

Just tell your kid to go out and play on the jungle gym – If he comes back, at least he’ll have a raging case of tetanus.

6. Mad Asian Gropage

The things mascots get away with – I guess there are perks for taking the job after all.

5. They do exist…

When I say this I don’t mean to sound racist, or sexist, or defamatory towards the disabled, or like an asshole, but that thing is god damn disgusting. In the words of Bill O’Reilly, “I don’t know what that is… I’ve never seen that.”

4. Bet you wish you had a garage…

What’s the post-ice process here? Ice pick? Heater? Wait until summer?

3. Why?

This is the type of product you purchase and then slip into a buddies pocket to see how he reacts. If he shows you and laughs, he’s cool. If he get’s embarassed and hides it – well – he’s hiding something from you (and likely himself).

2. If your junks broke, have a smoke…

This guy exudes indifferance and it’s amazing. How many people do you know that would pop their head out of the window to see what’s wrong while dragging their cigarette as their car sinks into a river. Awesome.

1. Office Mods…

This pair of skates is full of contradictions – Office chair wheels were obviously used to replace roller skate wheels, but based on the choice in shoes, this cannot be in an office. That said, maybe the boot owner had no use for the office chair and just really wanted some skates. Who knows…